Team FCK! CHOON KIT CHOON KIT! a world class team in a world class setting



Friday, August 29, 2008

PRE-SEASON'S UP AND RUNNING!!!

Been to River Nile, the Taj Mahal, Great Wall of China and South Africa during the summer vacation...But nothing beats the joy of being able to report and work for FCK United.
Wherever you guys went or whatever you all did during the summer, we will never ever be able to break away from the strong pulling force of FCK, our captain. "Once In FCK, FOREVER In FCK" as Choon kit used to warn us. So here we are, back in FCK headquarters, supporting our pathetic captain...

Without wasting any precious time, pre-season training got underway just a day after we returned from our summer vacations as our captain kept nagging about everyone having the need to stay fit in preparation for probably another tough and gruelling season. The first training session involved five of our members at the 'hockey pitch'. ( Elohim, Arvindh, Rakesh, Bryan and the captain himself ) . Reporters, as usual, gathered all around taking videos and photos of our captain in ACTION. But all was not entire;y fruitful for FCK....

Apparently during a training match between our club members...Rakesh had the ball in his grasp and Choon Kit and him were in a 2 v 1 situation against Bryan.

Choon Kit,"Rakesh!!Rakesh!!Pass the ball...I will score. I will not miss another open goal!!"

Obviously, Rakesh abided and slid a pass in the path of Choon Kit. Now Choon Kit had an unguarded goal to shoot at!! So he majestically took a step forward and shot at goal. ( This scene would turn out better if you imagined it in slow motion ). But to everyone's horror, the ball curled wide of the upright. Everyone was 'hands in heads' in disbelief. Reporters raced up to the captain...

Harry Dick overwhelmed with shock said,"Choon Kit... Wh...Wh...What happened?"

Captain however held his head up high and replied,"Didn't you guys know that I was a liar?? I was joking. I actually didnt mean to score that. I did not want to lower my teamates morale. Haha.."

At that moment, only Choon Kit's laughter could be heard. Everyone else was stunned and unable to utter a word.

This has brought about much controversy.. If Choon Kit is really a liar, then is what he said about being the next Torres really true? Either way, he will still be a failure. He either misses an open goal or will never be the next Torres. *Sighs*

P.S. Choon Kit was active during the summer though... Recruiting the likes of Ee Rong and K.Sarravanan. They would certainly be great additions. *Claps*

7:50 PM


Hey everyone, this is Mr B.I.G reporting late...

As you all might have already heard by mouth, numerous rumours that FCK has been permanently disbanded. Yes, with much regret, this is indeed true.
Its time to reveal the series of incidents that reduced the rising and promising FCK United to dust and rubble.

It all started during one faithful physics lesson. Mr Good Game was giving yet another monotonous lesson, driving our hyper active class to the verge of insanity with his ramblings, lame jokes and confusing explanations of the fundamentals of physics. Our beloved captain then decided to formulae a plan, no, an act of LIBERATION, for the sake of mankind’s future and the budding 4SA class of talents. It was codenamed Operation Valkyrie. The plan was simple, distract GG and Mr Kit would size GG’s throne of power and teach the class how to actually learn physics…..though he got like E8 for Physics….=.=

However, the plan had failed miserably. We had underestimated GG’s power. It seems he had a pool spies and informers, and was well aware of the Coup. As soon as Mr Kit got to the throne (and attempted to use the projector to teach physics though at times he seems more like performing a lame rubber band magic trick…but who knows? Never doubt our ever surprising and unpredictable captain!), a team of special commandos from Mr GG’s NCC army suddenly sprung up. With green and brown painted faces and armed to the teeth, these were obviously Mr GGs elite platoon They surrounded Mr Kit and held him at gun point, threatening to kill him if the other conspirators did not own up. We were obliged to reveal our secret identitiesL

“Huh? What happened? I thought got magic trick?” Zhao Long, as….decelerated as ever, was obviously oblivious to our current predicament.
“No! I cannot go to detention class! I got perfect record for good behaviour….my mommy will scold me..Sob..Sob….I got Hindi tuition later lah…and my nose very pain”, was Rakesh’s reaction.
Pastor Aaron could only kneel down and pray for a miracle to happen. From what it seems, even Divine Intervention would not help…

To be continued…..

1:20 PM

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

The team has stopped functioning but we will still be alumni of our own team.
which has no future players.(ironic)

well. goodbye F.C.K.
you'll never fall alone,


always in our hearts, the FCK flames burn brightly!

8:15 PM

Friday, August 01, 2008

Good evening world, This is A.jacques and here im bringing you the newest news there is any newer then the newer news you ever heard.

latest transfer
we got Eerong the winger/gk on a Chinatown free transfer, which that makes our coach having to pay only for his services. he has shown he can do it all by trying to keep imitating kong zhao loong's backheel™ , he has proved trusthworthy though he can leak out of his left back position and occasionally score own goals. which in dismay caught our international gk AK unaware.

We also have opened up a youth academy , with credits going to F.C.K letter writing company, quality letters for life ,which we see two promising players and a possible player of Eewei, the younger brother of latest transfer Eerong, which then can form the Lovely brother combo.

we have seen defensive talents in the shockingly short and weird character of Chadwyn, where he will constantly laugh at nobody for no apparent reason, but he can defend so well he need not close his eyes, he has also be proven to push the team up for attack sometimes.

we have also seen attacking talents in the abilities of shorter but mobile striker Timothy Zhang(imported directly from china) , he constantly move about the field with a smile on his face, which either scares or cheers up his oppenent, and might score occasionaly , not missing any open goals.

with up to 4 new players entering F.C.K united, the club is always constantly on the move to be a world class team of professional players, which we also do supply letter writing services too.

recently we have finished filiming the advertisement of Motivational speech .
we just have to wait for the men behind the scene in (black?) to finish up on the video.
well. we just have to wait.


today we had a match on our homegrounds , the astro turf, which we bought in mid 2008 for a price of 10c. and it has proven worthy for our stars to play on,
today we played against 4s1 united , which we see the common people, and have our precious gk AK injured on the ear by player Darren Neo of 4s1 united,
later in the match, when more unknown players joined in, we have been shocked by the fact that by then, we 're convinced everyone wants to hurt AK, that unknown noisy player JJ has hit out against him with a kick on the nose while AK was doing a dive-or-die save.
this in turns left AK knocked out and the match has to be stopped, as no offical time keeper took the time, the match was left un-recorded.

Then Ak recovered fast after drinking some drinks and played against the Kim Knights where the score was rumoured to be a draw, well we cannot accept this match as our captain was not there and that no proper match was conducted.

This week has been a busy week and that many people got injured, many interference of matches and many events taking place , well we hope during next week we will get lesser of all this nonsense, well , this is A.Jacques reporting live with the latest news and goodbye.
we'll see you again.

10:37 PM

SQUAD;


Captain + Coach + Owner :
Fong Torres Choon Kit (Striker)(Professional Dummy)

Attk. Finale:
Dummy at open goal.(Misses open goal.Inceases teammate moral greatly knowing that they would not be lousiest in team)


Item Skill:
Empower (empowers his new shoes to give him god-like kick for 1 kick)

Def. Finale: Captains pressence(Pressures opponent by making weird movements and noises.Has no other practical uses.)

Member :
Kong Scholes Zhao Loong (Seondary Striker)

Attk. Finale: Backheel (backheels ball catching opponent.. maybe even teammate unaware)

Def. Finale: Goalkeeper's dribble (when in goalkeeper mode,he would suddenly dribble the ball forward, becoming a Striker, increasing teams overall ATTK while leaving goal post open)

Member :
Alvin Cech der Sar Kang ( Goalkeeper )

Attk. Finale: A Strong kick (A strong kick with all his might with no hesitaion. May injure opponent keeper and has a great chance to miss)

Def. Finale: Flying legs (His legs would suddenly stretch at impossible angle upwards blocking air balls)

Member :
Elohim 'lekgwathi lucky' Chor (GOD) (Defender/Keeper)

Attk. Finale: Fake Step over (Does stepover BEHIND the teammate with ball stunning opponents looking at its pure stupidity)

Def. Finale: Hand of GOD (Prays for help from God and does a rare catch or save that is unexpected, living up to his name)

Member :
Bryan Carragher Gerrard Wong (Defender/Centre Mid)

Attk. Finale: A strong kick with accuracy(Shoots with addidas predator shoe with power and accuracy)

Def. Finale: Crunching tackles(Would slide opponents dribbling towards goal)

Member :
Arvindh Fabregas Rai (Centre Mid)

Attk. Finale: Summon darkness (summons ancient 'punjabi' soccer skills hidden within turning him slightly darker after use)

Def. Finale: Charge of darkness(does a frenzy charge from the frontlines, seemingly merging in the shadows unoticed for a while, in an attempt to defend)

Member :
Rakesh Van Persie Rai (Winger)

Attk. Finale: Summon shoes (The usually barefooted player summons powerful soccer shoes and OWNS.. only usable on friday)

Def. Finale: 'camo' (Camos in the darkness during corners, lurking behind GK, reappears suddenly to block ball)

Member:
Isaac 'Chiongster' Cheong(2nd goalkeeper)

Attk. Finale: Bide ( Laughs and laughs and laughs until he turns red and suddenly unleashes this internal energy and kicks)

Def. Finale: Chiong (Unleashes his hidden family skill chionging, sprinting at attackers, increases acceleration by 100%, good for keeper's Strike and Slide tatics, taking ball away before opponent realises.

 Member :
Aaron Pastor Chua (Club's personal pastor/priest)

Attk. Finale:Gods voice (Does a desperate prayer to GOD to boost his power .. attacking with ear piercing screams given by GOD)

Def. Finale: Call for help (Shrieks in a high pitch voice only heard by team members increasing their speed to aid in defence)


STATISTICS;

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This feature started since 12 july 2008 to 9 October 2008

Team's Record;

Wins --- 7
Draws --- 5
Losts --- 3
Goals scored --- 59
Goals conceded --- 44

Last 5 Results;

vs The 4S1 Gang (draw 2-2)
vs Justin Mavericks (won 6-4)
vs The 4S1 gang (draw 4-4)
vs ST STormers (5-5 *any mistake due to bad refreeing please inform us) vs The KIM Knights (Jasper warriors evolution) (won 3-2)

GAMES PLAYED;

Bryan --- 19
Elohim --- 19
Choon Kit --- 18
Rakesh --- 14
Zhao Loong--- 13
Alvin --- 11
Aaron --- 8
Arvindh --- 5
Issac --- 3

TOP SCORERS;

Bryan --- 22
Rakesh --- 15
Zhao Loong --- 9
Arvindh --- 8
Choon Kit --- 7
Alvin --- 4
Issac --- 2
Aaron --- 2
Elohim --- 1

ASSISTS;

Bryan --- 14
Rakesh --- 11
Zhao Loong --- 8
Arvindh --- 7
Alvin --- 4
Choon Kit --- 3
Issac --- 1
Elohim --- 0
Aaron --- 0

SHOTS BLOCKED;

Elohim --- 18
Rakesh --- 10
Alvin --- 8
Bryan --- 6
Issac --- 2
Zhao Loong --- 2
Aaron --- 1
Arvindh --- 0
Choon Kit --- 0

OPEN GOALS MISSED;

Choon Kit --- 5
Zhao Long --- 1
The rest --- 0

INJURIES;

1)Choon Kit ----- Got hit in head and belly twice by Elohim and Jasper Kim respectively
(still can play)
----- Got hit by Alvin Kang in the hand during corner practice(still can play)
----- constantly healing but gets injured once and then(still can play)
2)Zhao long ----- Brain problem, (probaly never ever heal, no signs of improvement, but still can play)
3)Elohim ----- Temporary Asthma (out for 1 week, still strong and ever out again)
4)AK ----- Kicked on the face and attacked on the ear( out for a month, but still can play)

MAKE ME HAPPY;

1)Sign Jasper Kim for $1.80!
2)Keep as many players as possible
3)Beat Banglah Fc / Jasper Warriors
4)Help Choon Kit to become the next Torres
5)Create a team Jersey
6)Buying "FCK need U" badges for team to wear in place of school badge

LINKS;

Kong(scholes)zhao loong(not recomended, Lowers your IQ)


Bryan Carragher Gerrard Wong(not recomended, not updated)


Aaron Chua..may God bless us (recomended for christians)




Speak;


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Timeturner;

June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008

Layout;

Featuring: Footballers; Rakesh , Choon Kit , Bryan, Alvin , Elohim , Zhao Loong.
Designer: alvin
Coding: PeachMirage
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